B is for Blessings and Bliss

Yippee! For the past days I have been in a state of Euphoria.

My appraisal turned out well. I'm gonna get a basic salary raise, my item got finalized and is now official and i got a merit increase as well... The past months of sacrifice will soon come to an end. *Thank you, Lord for all these blessings*

I got myself a full body massage at Golden Blind Masseurs. My very first massage experience. As my masseur provided pressure on my body, I could not help but think that she might leave bruises on my skin. By the time I got relaxed and in the verge of sleeping, the massage session ended. I woke up with a body ache. ha ha ha! I hope to try another massage place next time. And I hope my bffs will be there too... :)

I got great news and I can't wait for August... I am happy! So very happy! I hope this bliss will be contagious and spread all throughout the world!

Rain

When it rains, it pours and today's rain is no exception. I love it when it rains. The cool air makes me feel like I'm at the bukid. Its no comparison, I know, but its the closest thing I can get. How I wanted to go home right away so I can cook some noodles and sip hot soup. I wanted to snuggle and hug my pillow too. But I was not able to do so... The heavy downpour left me stranded at the stations... As the clock tick and the hours flew by with me wishing the rain would stop or a jeepney route home with a vacant space will fill-up at the station, I thought of what the rain signifies.

I have this tendency to perceive what things around me would symbolize and the rain was no different. Yes, rain is a natural occurrence, a season in the tropics and a water cycle. Its that simple so why do I complicate it? Maybe because I have questions and I look for signs, for answers... *now you've met the weird, praning side of me... ha ha ha!*

After a long wait, i finally got to ride a jeepney and to my disappointment, no sikad was around in our street plus to make situation worse, I have to submerge good ol' chuck in a puddle of water. With no umbrella, I walked the dimly lit street and arrived home soaking wet... *daig pa ang basang sisiw*
Insight: I can sometimes ran out of luck...

Tomorrow will be our annual performance appraisal, and I'm quite nervous about it. Its judgment day for my long-over-due-needs-to-be-resolved package. I have heard negative feedback about this year's appraisal. *fingers crossed for good news*
Insight: Pray for the best...

I'm yawning now and my eyes is heavy. I'm ready to doze off. Set my alarm early, report is half done. Adios for now!

Changes

They say “nothing in this world is constant except change”. For someone like me who finds solitude in stagnant, stable and unruly state of circumstances, change is unwelcome. Not that I abhor or resist it, I just have a hard time adapting to it. Take my career shift, for example. I have moved out of my 8 hour 5 day a week duty to a 24/7 on call work with unresolved salary package. Why? Opportunity. To travel, to have career growth and even financial growth.

Now, I am yet challenged to face another change: Transfer. A few days ago, my boss called me saying there will be a development for our team. He said I just might be assigned somewhere in the South. I was dumbfounded but only said, ” Ok, Sir.” I was not in the position to debate nor refuse, that would mean resignation. He didn’t further give any information but I asked about the current person assigned in the area and he said he is okay. He ended the phone conversation after saying, “We’ll talk about it when we get there”. Itried to fish out information that may give me truth about this development but to no avail. I’m waiting, hoping for a much clear set-up and when the time is right I just might voice out my hesitation.

Transfer would mean loneliness. Far from my family and friends. To a place new when I have just settled in my rented place. To diverse culture with so little connection. With all this thoughts clouding my mind, I surrender everything to The Almighty. The night before that call, I have unloaded buckets of tears. Crying my heart out once again until I fell asleep. Another emotional moment for me. I was tired. Tired of being alone. Tired of having to be always responsible. With my tears I prayed for direction and I can only trust Him that the call is his way of answering my plea.

bee hive

Here’s my first entry at my new home, not entirely new since I’ve had a blogspot blog before that I deleted for no reason. I pray I'll be able to maintain this blog now. I find writing/blogging therapeutic as I am able to connect with my inner self, my thoughts and feelings.

Similar to my reality, I have learned to let go of grudges and hurts, let go of people not worth holding on, and stayed away from complications. This is a brand new start. A new beginning.

Read. Don’t judge. Enjoy. Welcome to my hive!!!