Changes

They say “nothing in this world is constant except change”. For someone like me who finds solitude in stagnant, stable and unruly state of circumstances, change is unwelcome. Not that I abhor or resist it, I just have a hard time adapting to it. Take my career shift, for example. I have moved out of my 8 hour 5 day a week duty to a 24/7 on call work with unresolved salary package. Why? Opportunity. To travel, to have career growth and even financial growth.

Now, I am yet challenged to face another change: Transfer. A few days ago, my boss called me saying there will be a development for our team. He said I just might be assigned somewhere in the South. I was dumbfounded but only said, ” Ok, Sir.” I was not in the position to debate nor refuse, that would mean resignation. He didn’t further give any information but I asked about the current person assigned in the area and he said he is okay. He ended the phone conversation after saying, “We’ll talk about it when we get there”. Itried to fish out information that may give me truth about this development but to no avail. I’m waiting, hoping for a much clear set-up and when the time is right I just might voice out my hesitation.

Transfer would mean loneliness. Far from my family and friends. To a place new when I have just settled in my rented place. To diverse culture with so little connection. With all this thoughts clouding my mind, I surrender everything to The Almighty. The night before that call, I have unloaded buckets of tears. Crying my heart out once again until I fell asleep. Another emotional moment for me. I was tired. Tired of being alone. Tired of having to be always responsible. With my tears I prayed for direction and I can only trust Him that the call is his way of answering my plea.